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Friday, 19 September
Prepare To Be Boreded

Arrrr! So 'tis Talk Like A Pirate day, herrrm? Avast! I talk like a pirate while at me miserable work! Arrr! I go to three-hour meetings! Ye can hear me talk about database queries and scurvy fucking primary keys! Arr! I don't know what I'm doing!

Me blasted co-workers plague me like thrice-accursed harpies pecking at me fucking neck! Me voice mail overfill with bilge water of complaints! Truly, 'tis terrible to be a pirate today at work!

I cannot go on any longer! Arrr! I shall walk me own plank! Avast! See for yourself my 20th-story window! I run at it mightily, and me terrified parrot bounces on me shoulder nervously! I scream at me co-workers, "YOU HAVE BROKEN ME MIGHTY PIRATE HEART, YE DIRTY COXSWAINS!" just because it sounds dirty, and then I plunge through yon window! Crash!

AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrr. . . !

(Thud.)

(Pause.)

(Distantly) Arrr! Now I am a zombie pirate! Avast! Now I can do a summer movie with Johnny Depp!

Wordplay | Skot | 19 Sep, 2003 |

Note: Comments are closed on old entries.

Comments

OK. There's no two ways about it. You. Are. Totally. Silly.

Thank you for providing me a belly laugh when I really needed it.

Your blog rocks.

Comment number: 003631   Posted by: moose on September 19, 2003 01:57 PM from IP: 63.227.241.109

arr. you should try "savvy". that one's fun. it's johnny depp's favorite, too.

Comment number: 003632   Posted by: cat on September 19, 2003 02:04 PM from IP: 65.247.138.88

Now ye wouldn't be pullin' Ol' Blind Pew's one good leg about this one, now would ye laddy? 'Cause if ye were I'd set the mate, Mr. Human Resources Director on ye for a little closed door floggin'.

Comment number: 003633   Posted by: pops on September 19, 2003 04:38 PM from IP: 12.212.69.66

>boreded?

boarded!

Comment number: 003634   Posted by: ms on September 20, 2003 03:21 PM from IP: 64.229.52.132

I can't stop laughing. Love your blog, man.

Comment number: 003635   Posted by: Romy on September 21, 2003 07:39 AM from IP: 208.200.182.205

> boarded!

You're clearly missing something.

Comment number: 003636   Posted by: P. E. Dant on September 22, 2003 08:30 AM from IP: 146.7.42.38

Arrg. I love it when words like Coxswain and Parse can be used in the same sentence.
Voicemail & Bilgewater.Too keen.
Bring out the Grog!
A toast to you!

Comment number: 003637   Posted by: Oarah on September 22, 2003 06:44 PM from IP: 66.82.9.24

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