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skot AT izzlepfaff DOT com

Thursday, 06 February
A Casual Overview of Some Online Friends, Except That I'm Barking Mad


This guy is crazy smart and more than a little crazy himself. I liked his Feb. 2 post on hot chicks in planes. I can only imagine having sex with Loise Thaden, but Snark helps me imagine. He can kind of get out of control though, like when he calls John Gruden a "butt pirate." That's just not cool, Snark, but shine on you crazy diamond! Overall his site is, as Beerbohm Tree remarked, "Funny without being vulgar."


Before you ask, "calamondin" is Nepalese for "eat shit." This wacky gal is quite the misanthrope, and sometimes it's hard to read her crazed paranoid ramblings, but I love this woman, so I just usually get really drunk before surfing there. She runs some nutty-ass project called "20 Inch Thingies" and the less said about that, the better. You dirty girl!


For a manic-depressive, agoraphobic Christian hog butcher, Brad is pretty funny. He can kind of get a little one-note with the whole abstinence thing, but he tries to stay happy-go-lucky between court appearances. Once a year, Brad goes off his meds and runs around in a killing frenzy; his pet name for it is "Breaking Heads with Brad." But you're the best, Brad! I'm pulling for you on the extradition thing!

John 13

What can you say about John 13? He's a story. It couldn't have been easy being Manitoba's first test-tube baby (the other 12 were tragically lost thanks to an errant hungry dog), but John persevered and now of course is Professor of Transgender Issues at Brown college. His weblog is kind of a sprawl, but the whimsical animated flower .gifs and hippie art can be childishly endearing. A movie was made about Johnny once called "The Boy in the Hilarious Canadian Bubble," but he doesn't like to talk about it, I think because the kid who played him was Ben Affleck, and how gay is that? (Whoops! Sorry Perfesser! You know I loves ya!)

Note: Comments are closed on old entries.


stfu skot u dont know shit fuck balls these sights all rock hard and not in that way u get hard around rocks heh stfu... this site used 2 be good but then u got stupid u ignorant fuck stfu u suck.

Comment number: 002471   Posted by: Rob on February 7, 2003 06:10 AM from IP:

My site is finally attracting the kind of comments it truly deserves! Thank you, Rob! God, I miss IRC.

Comment number: 002472   Posted by: Skot on February 7, 2003 07:45 AM from IP:

Ooh, ooh, do one about me!

Comment number: 002473   Posted by: mark on February 7, 2003 10:52 AM from IP:

One day, Skot will be MY friend too. Just as soon as the priestess gets back to me about that voodoo doll I wanted. Hey, Skot? Can I borrow a piece of your hair? It'll only be a minute, really.

*hides box of pins*

Comment number: 002474   Posted by: Crinkle on February 7, 2003 11:07 AM from IP:

Hey, I got a request!


Mark reads, and reads a lot. I have never seen him without a copy of Juggs or Tip-Top Tube Tops, and if you email him he will send you back issues! I do not recommend his dogeared copy of Suck It Digest, however. Mark is preternaturally smooth and unwrinkled, and gives the impression of having been turned on a lathe, but his website is spiffy and refreshingly free of extra features, such as content or readability. So many people get hung up on this, but not Mark. So here's to Mark, my favorite four-eyed bald porn enthusiast ever!

Comment number: 002475   Posted by: Skot on February 7, 2003 12:21 PM from IP:

Oh, and Crinkle, I consider you my friend! I have the same warm feelings for you that I have for all of the women whose bushes I hide in and stare obsessively through their windows! By the way, I really enjoy your solo interpretive dance routines.

Comment number: 002476   Posted by: Skot on February 7, 2003 12:23 PM from IP:

That's not true, is it?

Comment number: 002477   Posted by: rodii on February 7, 2003 03:59 PM from IP:

I'm in an iron lung, dude. It's tough to stalk anything.

Comment number: 002478   Posted by: Skot on February 7, 2003 04:04 PM from IP:

%I want to be Skot's friend too.%


Comment number: 002479   Posted by: lia on February 7, 2003 05:02 PM from IP:

All together now!

Judiford G. Snarkanderson the XIIth does this great website, featuring Christian hog-butcher porn. S/he is a subscriber to and managing editor of Aviatrix Dominatrix, which is a curiously hairless Nepalese hog butcher porno mag. A giant metal man from St. Louis, Chicago, Boston, D.C., and San Francisco, Judiford likes listening to Phish, meeting online friends, watching homoerotic Flash movies about Oakland Raiders personnel, and exfoliating itself to death.

Lia, on the other hand, has a small dog and lives in New York.

Comment number: 002480   Posted by: Snarky on February 7, 2003 05:38 PM from IP:

You realize now we're ALL going to want one.

Comment number: 002481   Posted by: redfox on February 7, 2003 06:04 PM from IP:

I've got no chance. I'm going to be forever eulogized as that guy...

Comment number: 002482   Posted by: Anil on February 10, 2003 03:03 AM from IP:

There is always a chance Anil, this is where memes are butchered and served to the public in user friendly chunks. Skot is the conduit.

Comment number: 002483   Posted by: Johnny on February 11, 2003 08:27 AM from IP:

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