Your urban misadventures have all the makings of a revolutionary alternative video game, Skot. Something like ‘Grand Urban Hassle’.

(I love posting comments from Europe – you always get to be the first, Bwaahaahaa!)

Those fresh-faced kids soliciting monthly recurring contributions to charities are not volunteers. They are employees of various companies that take a huge cut of whatever donations are given. Here in Portland solicitors for "Save the Children" or some such shit are on every corner. The Secretary of State has a disclosure section on their webiste where these operators must disclose their financial arrangements with the charities they works for. In the case of the company shilling for "Save the Children," they guarantee that the charity will get at least one penny out of every dollar collected.

One penny.

Every time you have a post about the homeless crazies on Broadway, Skot, it's like a trip down memory lane. Sure, I remember the tow-headed Faulknerian man-boy. What about the "blind" lady who stood outside QFC, smelling the air like a snake, waiting for some bourgeoise to pass by and jingle some loose change? She still there?

So we've got a new local panhandler, a boy of about 18 or so I'd guess. He stands right outside the McDonald's parking lot exit with a "Hungry, please help" sign.. and his schtick is giving ya the hairy eyeball while you shove french fries in your face.

And he's SO WEARING AN AMERICAN EAGLE OUTFITTERS HOODIE. He just rubbed dirt on it.

Ahh, but that liberal guilt.. bastard's got about ten bucks from me so far.

I really miss the Crazy Eye Van Ladies. They was my faves.

Loved this sentence: "He was like the quietest, loneliest Phish concert ever." Beautiful.

Bloody Scientologist bastard stopped me once and told me Scientology could give me what I most wanted in life. I said I wanted to be 4 inches taller. He gulped a bit and said they could arrange that as long as I came with him right now to their testing centre round the corner. Where no doubt they test your wallet:sanity ratio and have a rack.

crazy eye van people were not egyptian, but wanted to be. they were scary.

have you noticed the growing-every-day 40 party in the parking lot on the south side of the Capitol Hill end of the overpass? Todat at 4 there were about fifteen people, prerparing to hear the invisble music. I've noticed them every day for a week now.

PLAN isn't a Jesus-based organization, regardless of what the bimbo said. I sponsor two kids with them, and it's actually a well-thought-out organization that's not hell-bent on making every culture in the world Just Like Ours, actually working WITH the communities their workers are in. Not that you give a shit, but since it's the lone organization I actually trust with my money, I figured I'd at least make an attempt at defending it.
But since I want to punch those irritating (paid) Save the Children drones who prowl my neighborhood, I'm sympathetic all the same. I always just say through clenched teeth, "I'm a sponsor." Then they smile and go away. Keep that in mind. Or hit them with a shoe. Then you won't have to waste those quarters.

I actually know this man-boy of which you speak, and it is true that he is uniquely annoying and had driven me to be QUITE rude.

There's a "Mars Attacks" pinball game?!??!

The world is actually a better place than I thought it was.

Lol, reminds me of a trip I took about 10 years ago to Washington D.C., I was outside one of the Smithsonian museums and I saw this man, who otherwise looked like a well kempt business man in his over coat and slacks, asking kids for money as they got off the bus. The real kicker is that he wasn't just asking for spare change, but he was actually asking for $20 from each of them. I did a double take because at first I tried to rationalize that this wasn't some beggar, this was some museum offical collecting the entrance fee from the members of a school field trip. But he clearly had nothing to do with the museum as he walked around asking everyone for $20. It wasn't "can you spare $20" or "I really need $20 to eat" it was "Hey, gimme $20". It was really an education for me as to how brazen and what a sense of entitlment some members of our society have come to expect.

Best I've seen was the guy with the sign that said: "Why lie, I need a beer".

I've taken to carrying the help wanted ads with me and handing them out to the most needy among us.

Gosh I miss the good "Ye Olde Seattle Skid Row" -- where the term originated (the skid road was the route down the hill that the logs were skidded to Yesler's Mill -- now Yesler Way) -- real bums and winos King Street to Pike - and Western to 3rd -- those were the days --when Seattle still still had its soul -- heh heh heh heh instead of these modern day scum bags -- that have been spread out up the 3rd and pine and pike and to Broadway -- shows ya what a lack of affordable housing (flophouses) can do -- I say no more home construction in Seattle until the Pioneer Square flophouse culture has been rebuilt

My favorite is the guy who used to walk around the Fifth & Denny area asking people for a couple dollars to buy gasoline. He'd lay out this sob story about his car ran out of gas a couple miles down the road, and his wife & baby were still sitting inside, waiting for him to come back with a couple gallons of fuel so they can get home. The clown nailed me for three bucks the first time, and then tried to hit me up again the very next day, and a couple days after that. This went on for about four years. Somewhere along the line, he actually started carrying a gas can around with him for effect.

I lost my temper and told him off one day, and he said something like "Have you no compassion?" Nope. But I have a job and a tankful of gas, you stupid mooch.

Hi,
Not sure how I came upon your site, but it's really crazy and humourous at the same time! And yes, I'm a Canuck:) Nice work.